


Incredistory

by silksieve



Category: The Incredibles (2004)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-12-24
Updated: 2009-12-24
Packaged: 2017-10-05 03:22:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,119
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/37272
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/silksieve/pseuds/silksieve
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's Jack's 18th birthday, and his siblings come home to celebrate.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Incredistory

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Jougetsu](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jougetsu/gifts).



“Morph Man?” Dash snorted into his beer. “You’re going to call yourself ‘Morph Man?'”

“Like you could do any better,” Jack retorted, pulling at the fabric of the new suit E had sent over. “You just slapped a ‘the’ in front of your name. ‘The Dash?’ That took you, what, two seconds? It’s amazing your cover hasn’t been blown yet. Or that Allen hasn’t sued you for plagiarism.”

“Ah, young padawan, I see you are still in need of a few lessons in the concept of _simply genius_,” Dash waved regally from the couch.

“Both of you are idiots,” Vi said, handing Jack his boots. “Clearly, you need my superior guidance. And how many times do you need to watch Star Wars, anyway, Dash?”

“Until Princess Leia starts wearing a bra,” Dash said.

“You’re a pig,” Vi sniffed. “Jack, those look really nice!”

“I don’t know,” said Jack, pulling uncomfortably at the collar. “Why are all of E’s suits this tight? And the yellow’s a little bright, isn’t it?” 

“Hey, E’s the expert here, and you have to admit, you are pretty high maintenance when it comes to suits. And I kind of like the yellow. It reminds me of the ‘I’ on our old suits. Put on the rest and let’s see how it all comes together.” Violet paused. “Tony thinks we should have kept them. The old suits, I mean. You know, be all color-coordinated and everything.”

“That’s the worst idea in the world!” Dash cut in. “It’s a dead giveaway to supervillains about who’s important to you. And I mean that literally! Don’t you think they would use it against us? It’s why Mom and Dad encouraged us to start our own super identities when we turned eighteen. And obviously it was a good idea since practically every super family followed suit, pun intended. Hence, us here, now, celebrating little Jack’s birthday.” He gave Jack a friendly sneer before pointing his beer bottle at Violet. “Just because your husband draws comic books for a living and wants to play with his matching set of colored pencils does not make him an expert on superheroes! Stop listening to him!”

“You didn’t think he was so silly when you begged him to get you a press pass for San Diego this year.”

Jack raised an eyebrow. “Now you’re stealing Kent’s cover? Is there anyone you _haven’t_ mooched from?”

“I dunno,” Dash said thoughtfully. “Maybe I can ask Stark if I can borrow his assistant for a while. She’s pretty hot.”

“Only if you want to be dead first, and I’m not talking about what Tony’ll do to you,” Violet snorted. Turning back to Jack, she said, “He's been wanting to eavesdrop on the convention ever since he heard there was going to be a panel on ‘Supersonic Superheroes’ and wanted to make sure he was on the list of notables. Of course, it's right in the middle of track season at Metroville Middle, so I don't know how he'd pull the time."

"Oh, I'm sure the other coaching staff can handle a weekend without me," Dash said, waving off Vi's glare. "It's not as if I've never had to be unexpectedly absent or sick or suddenly indisposed." He coughed delicately then grinned and gave his chest a thump. 

“One day,” Jack said, “you are totally going to give yourself away by getting too close to the fans. You can’t hide anything from them!”

“Ha, you only wish you had some. Besides, I kind of like seeing all the fan versions of my suit."

“Invisigirl has her own fan club,” Vi said, unnecessarily.

“It doesn’t count when the president is the guy you’re married to,” Dash scowled.

“It does when there are more than four hundred new pledges a month. Besides, I didn’t _ask_ him to start it, and that makes all the difference,” Vi said smugly. She peered back at Jack. “How’s it going there, Jacks?”

“Um. Hang on.” Jack adjusted the mask that E had provided as the final touch to his new suit, and turned back to his siblings. “What do you think?”

Violet clapped her hands together. “Oh, Jack, you look great!”

“Our baby brother, with grown up clothes and everything!” Dash mimed wiping away a tear. “Seriously, though, man, you look good. Totally ready to hand some supervillains their asses.”

“I may have just turned 60, but I can still hear you, young man!” shouted a voice from the kitchen. 

All three junior Parrs winced.

“I know you know and say worse, but we’re going to keep our language clean in this house,” said Helen Parr, wiping her floured hands on her apron and gazing at her children from the entrance to the living room. 

“Yes, ma’am!” grinned Dash, undeterred, and throwing off a small salute.

“Oh, Jack.” Jack squirmed as his mother’s eyes softened, and she came closer to ruffle his hair a little. “My little boy. It looks perfect on you, honey.”

“Mo-om!” Jack protested, and hurriedly smoothed his hair back into place. “It’s not as if you’ve never seen me in a suit before. I’m not a kid trying out his powers for the first time!”

“I know. It’s just that, well, you’re my baby.” She glanced around at her children. “You’re all my babies. It’s going to be different around here without any of you underfoot.” She poked Violet in the side. “Although tell that husband of yours to work harder on getting me grandbabies.”

“I did not just hear you say that,” Violet said, eyes to the ceiling, while both her brothers made gagging noises. “And in an obvious attempt to change the subject, I suggest that we take Jacks and his new suit down to the Man Cave to put it through its paces and make sure it adapts with all his transformations and everything.”

“I wish you wouldn’t call your father’s sit room the Man Cave. He’s very touchy about it.”

“C’mon, Mom, you think it’s funny. What else are we going to call it? He gets so serious—”

“And tyrannical,” volunteered Dash.

“And macho,” muttered Jack.

“And even if he sometimes gets a little giggly when he gets to do business there, you have to admit he tricked out that room as if his superpowers were based on testosterone alone,” Violet finished.

“Well, government contracts will allow a man to do that, and you’re all very lucky that he did, since it gives you a place to train without dipping into your own funds. Anyway, don’t stay too long down there. The cake’s almost done, and your father will be home soon.” She leaned in to give Jack a kiss on the cheek.

“Happy birthday, Jack-Jack.”

**Author's Note:**

> I guesstimated Violet, Dash, and Jack-Jack's ages from the movie as 13, 8, and 0, and bumped them to 31, 26, and 18, respectively, for the story.
> 
> I wanted to include Mr. Incredible, because he's awesome, but he just didn't fit into the story somehow. Maybe I'll go back and expand sometime, but I hope you enjoyed the mention, at least!
> 
> These grown-up versions of the kids have been living in the back of my head for quite some time now, so thank you for letting me put them down on paper as a Yuletide Treat for you! Happy Holidays!


End file.
